Taking the biscuit

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How the cool cookie crumbles. One day a loads of dosh ‘domestic goddess’ the next in court being vilified about a private life.

So if the TV production team needs some stand in programs here’s a theme not to be snorted at.

And one more relevant for our times. Yes, what about ‘How to Knock Up Some Tasty Morsels From Your Local Food Bank.’

In fact for readers who remember wartime rationing, food economy is nothing new, for then every little did indeed help.

Before the war Britain had imported much of its food, but with supplies threatened by events in Europe the Government came up with the slogan ‘Grow More Food.’

Then in the following year a newspaper came up with the snappier ‘Dig for Victory’ – which the authorities promptly pinched.

War Agricultural Executive Committees, more commonly known as War Ags were set up to convert grass land to crop production and in Bucks a County Committee was formed.

Corresponding to the area of the local District Councils beneath this came local District Committees, composed of local farmers who organised a survey of the farms and suggested amendments.

For each farm the District Committee filled in a Farm Survey Card and farmers were graded according to their perceived competence.

‘A’ meant that the farmer seemed competent, ‘B’ denoted a farmer who needed only occasional help from the Committee.

While of the ‘C’ grade, one division dealt with ‘A farmer who, though reasonably competent, because of obstinacy, prejudice or laziness etc, is not prepared to revise his methods or increase his production.’

But back to the present and the Food Bank program. And if they need a studio set I’ve not only installed mood lighting in the kitchen but have also practised the obligatory coy, sideward glances and the seductive toss of my flowing locks.

All while stirring the baked beans. So that should keep the viewers simmering.

Now who should I approach about the advertising.