Toby Lock's Alternative MK Dons awards

By this point, we will have a fair idea of who will be picking up the top awards at tonight's MK Dons Player of the Year awards – after all, we've had precious little else to wonder about during the last three months.

But there is so much more to tell from the 2019/20 season, so many other moments that will not get recognised with a trophy, so in a tradition usually kept for the MK Dons matchday programme, here are the Alternative MK Dons awards.

Alex Gilbey is likely to be in line for a couple of awards tonight, but he won't be expecting the Biggest Jump of the Season award. He didn't score a header this season, but did in fact leap like a salmon when part of the wall fell off during a press conference back in December – CLICK HERE FOR THE VIDEOFrom the same room, attention switches to the gaffer for the Cutest Couple award. When asked by yours truly about the recent performances of Jordan Houghton back in February, Russell Martin put it all on the line by declaring his love for Jordan Houghton just days before Valentine's Day. Immortalised on a TV documentary that was being filmed that day, Russ' feelings were reciprocated later by the midfielder.

Mr Houghton will pick up another prize tonight: that of the Awkward Honour award. After the poor 3-1 defeat at home to Tranmere Rovers, he had the dubious honour of facing our questions after the game. However, while we faced him in the tunnel, over the shoulders of the media pack was chairman Pete Winkelman, asking for a meeting with manager Paul Tisdale, where he would sack him with immediate effect. Houghton would have been more than aware of what was going on but managed to keep a professional head, even when asked whether Tisdale was the right man to carry on in the job. The answer was fairly redundant within the hour.

In the build-up to the sacking of Tis though comes arguably the most bizarre game I've ever witnessed, and certainly the oddest game of the campaign: Fleetwood away. Mad for a series of reasons, a couple of awards go out to this one. First off, the What Did We Just Watch award for the entirely ludicrous approach Dons took. In a dismal run of form, the approach of 'boot it to the halfway line and don't chase it' was as anti-football as it gets. But it nearly worked, with only a late calamity earning Fleetwood the points.Also, a shout-out to the Dons fans there, who win the Song of the Season prize for their expletive-laden rendition of a song aimed at me. Here's to you!

Speaking of expletives, a quick chat with Brennan Dickenson, now of a different parish, after his red card against Coventry City in the Leasing.com Trophy put us in no uncertain terms about whether referee Charles Breakspear was on his Christmas card list, earning him the No Friend of Mine award.

Given how it is the same usual suspects popping up in press boxes and at press conferences following Dons around the country, it's of little surprise that I hand out an award to Dons' Media Manager Antoni Fruncillo. Not for arranging interviews, dishing out phone numbers or arranging Zoom calls during the lockdown period, but instead for more dubious honours: the Are You Alright, Mate? award as he missed not on but two junctions to get off the motorway as we attempted to get back to Milton Keynes one Saturday. This came after he ignored the lady asking for money in the car park earlier in the day too, much to our amusement.

Having now covered the club for a decade, and yet to earn an award at the ceremony, such is tradition in the alternative awards to give myself a prize, and this year I'm awarding myself the Check It Before You Play It award. Sent a video during the pre-season game at Northampton, I hadn't counted on an innocent video of Arsenal's Sead Kolasinac turning out to have an... alternative soundtrack (if you know, you know). Playing suitably loudly across the main stand, plenty of fans will have been sent similar videos, but felt no pity for my plight. Cheers.